God of War Laufey and Wolverine are snubbing PC, as rumoured, but I bet they come crawling back sometime after the launch of PS6

In the recently announced God Of War Laufey, you will not step into the shoes of John Kratos's dearly departed wife Faye. You will not embark on a rollercoaster adventure through a syncretic, pick-and-mix "Everywhen" of dead mythological figures that sounds suspiciously like the backdrop for a future God Of War Smash Bros.

There will be no "intimate, brutal combat", combining the fluidity and juggle potential of God of War's Ancient Greek era with the camera perspective and architectural stylings of the Norse instalments. You will not get to punch people so hard they sneeze their souls out, or lacerate them with a flippity-dippity ribbon sword. You will not get to obliterate a Tibetan dharmapāla, or kick sand in the face of the Egyptian goddess of disease. You will not get to experience this famously masculine series through the eyes of a woman, and never ever shall you ever befriend a cube of cosmic jelly.

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