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I'm psyched about Pinocchiosouls


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Once upon a time, everyone and their mother was making a Soulslike game. That era has passed, and things are getting goddamn weird now. Like simulator games delving into odder and odder jobs, studios working on Soulslikes are tossing the formula at the goofiest settings they can possibly imagine. Case in point: Korean developer Neowiz is making a grim, Bloodborne-like Pinocchio game and I regret to inform you that I'm psyched about this edgy little liar boy, actually.

If I made a list of stories that would support a Dark Souls-like video game spinoff, Pinocchio would not appear on it. And yet, a new gameplay trailer for the soulslike action game Lies of P popped up at Gamescom. It just gets relentlessly, unapologetically edgier every time I see it.

This puppet lad has an ability called Deus X Makina for goodness sake.

He's slowly opening heavy doors with his mecha hand. He's taking elevators. He's fighting giant bosses. You know, soulslike stuff. Also, he's very pretty for some reason, as is his old man Geppetto. Why not?

In Lies of P's first gameplay trailer last year, we got a look at some extremely soulslike action combat with its fantasy 1800s setting. Today's new trailer includes the game's interface and hot damn that sure is Real Boy Bloodborne. Your puppet pal has two equipped weapon slots, what look like healing items to cycle through, along with different skills based on his equipped left hand.

"With Pinocchio being a doll, you can change parts of his body to gain new skills and hopefully an edge in battle," Neowiz explains. "But not all of the enhancements are for fighting though, they can also provide several other unique and useful features."

In the new trailer, you can spot abilities called Deus X Makina, Puppet String, Flamberge, Fulminis, and Falcon Eyes. I've not quite worked out what they all do, but Puppet String looks to be a grappling ability for pulling Pinocchio towards large bosses and getting in a special attack.

The only thing throwing me off is his extremely supportive talking hip lantern that yells "Alright buddy, I'm here for ya. Don't worry!" Just when I thought I'd absorbed all of the cognitive dissonance of a Pinocchio soulslike it throws me a cheery companion device out of left field. I hope it delivers the lantern buddy with as much austerity as everything else.

I'm not the only weirdo psyched about edgy Pinocchio, it turns out. Gamescom Opening Night Live happened to include a couple awards during its show, mostly fluffy "most wanted" fan picks. But hey, Lies of P took home "Most-wanted Sony PlayStation game" over The Devil In Me and One Piece Odyssey. It is coming to PC though, don't worry.

Lies of P doesn't have a release date yet, but it's planning to launch sometime in 2023.

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